3 Ways to Protect Your Peace
Summer Neal
By: Summer Neal
Peace doesn’t come to us haphazardly. If we want to live in peace, we must seek it out. We must actively pursue it.
I have learned that protecting my peace is an active assignment.
I was recently reminded of Luke 11:9, “And I tell you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock and it will be opened to you.” (English Standard Version)
This principle applies to every aspect of our lives. Anything we want in this life, good or evil, requires effort on our part.
This is especially true in seasons of difficulty.
Friends, life is going to hand you some hard times. Fact. If you need evidence, I’d like to refer you to the Covid-19 pandemic. That mess affected all of us in some way.
Not to mention the normal ups and downs of life. Financial hardship, family difficulties, sickness, depression, anxiety. You get the idea, right?
So what do we do when the quality of our life is affected by the circumstances of our life? Are their changes we can make to continue living in peace even in the midst of hardship?
Absolutely.
1. Read your Bible & pray.
I know this may seem elementary to many of you but reading the Word and prayer is foundational to protecting your peace.
“The Bible gives us hope.”
God’s Word is how He speaks life into us. Prayer is how we keep the line of communication with God open and free flowing.
“Your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.” – Pslam 119:105
Even in darkness, we will know which way to go if we are guided by prayer and God’s Word.
The Bible gives us hope.
“For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope.” – Romans 15:4
I learned something very important while recently trudging through the muddy waters of grief. You can simultaneously have hope and lament.
What do I mean by that? Friend, you can be in a hard place, going through the hard things and still have peace and hope for a better future.
Let’s look at Lamentations 3:19-24
“Remember my affliction and my wanderings, the wormwood and the gall! My soul continually remembers it and is bowed down within me. But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning great is your faithfulness. ‘The Lord is my portion,’ says my soul, ‘therefore I will hope in him.’”
“You can simultaneously have hope and lament.”
We often think our perspective must be one or the other. Hope or lament. But, in fact, we can simultaneously hope and lament.
The following is an excerpt that I found profoundly helpful…
“Hope lives within the complexity of lament. Hope and lament are intimately intertwined, ‘without lament, hope is stillborn.’… it is easy to view lament and hope as opposing forces.. either we hope or lament today, and tomorrow it may be different… we need to hold the possibility that hope and lament are … simultaneous realities of human existence. One is not to be avoided while the other pursued; both bring meaning to the other.”
Find hope in God’s Word and speak to Him through prayer. Daily.
2. Avoid unhealthy conversations.
Look, I know you love your people. You want to talk to people about all the craziness, but you must be mindful of the content of your conversations.
This principle is two-fold. You have to guard the words you speak but you also have to guard against what others speak to you.
Look, I can give you a list of scriptures about the power of our words. In fact, you can check out this blog post, “10 Bible Verses on the Power of Our Words.”
I remember highlighting a scripture in my Bible when I was a teenager. I was so tired of hearing angry words and during a morning Bible study at my school, one of my friends spoke about this verse.
It quickly became one of my favorites.
“Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.” - Proverbs 16:24
I can’t even count the times I have quoted that scripture. To. My. Self.
Y’all, I’m generally a nice person but sometimes my mouth gets the best of me. I have to remind myself that my words feed my soul and I can feed it goodness or wickedness.
This is equally true about what you allow people to say to you.
I have never been a fan of gossip. Even as a kid, the whole “Did you hear…” blah blah blah was never a conversation I wanted to be a part of. I witnessed too many people get hurt and relationships destroyed because of gossip that I refused to be party to it.
Here’s the deal, though. Sometimes you must literally tell people to stop talking.
If you want to protect your peace, you may need to put boundaries on conversations. And that’s OK. If someone truly cares about you, they will understand that you simply can’t put a bunch of junk and hearsay and negativity into your head.
“Gossip is when a negative is discussed with anyone who can’t solve the problem.” I really wish I could take credit for that statement but it’s not mine. I heard Dave Ramsey say it in this video.
I love it, though. What the point of speaking negatively about someone or something to anyone who can’t help the problem? If you truly need to “vent,” I recommend doing it to a professional under the umbrella of confidentiality.
Otherwise, protect your peace by keeping your mouth and telling those around you to do the same. In the kindest way possible, of course!
3. Limit time spent with negative people.
“If you are in a stormy season, you must be mindful about the people you keep around you.”
Look, I know you want to believe that all the people in your life are wonderful, and they always encourage you and they would never be a negative influence in your life but don’t be blind by your affection for the people around you.
This can be difficult because often the people that create the negativity in your life are those you care about. You don’t want to have to distance yourself from them.
This isn’t about them. It’s about you. It’s about you protecting your peace.
You need to be wise in your assessment of your relationships.
It’s important to understand that we often go through seasons in our relationships. Sometimes we simply need to distance ourselves rather than completely sever a relationship.
This is why prayer and the Word are vital. It is through our open communication with God that He will direct our steps and give us discernment to know how to handle to these often tricky circumstances.
If you are in a stormy season, you must be mindful about the people you keep around you.
I have heard it said that you are the sum total of the 5 people with whom you spend the most time. I have found this to be 100% true.
If your time is spent with people who are constantly negative (either in conversation or actions) then you may need to change your circumstances.
**I do want to interject that if you happen to be married to the person bringing in the negativity, that is a blog for another day. I certainly am not telling you to end your marriage because your spouse is troubling you. Marriage counseling would be extremely beneficial in this instance.
Surround yourself with good people. People who will lift you up, not tear your down. People who pray instead of gossip. People who will support you and give you advice with love and in a way that will not harm you.
At the end of the day, your peace often comes down to the choices you are making. No, you can’t always control what life throws at you but protecting your peace is about things you can control. It’s about changing as much of your circumstance as possible to improve the quality of your life & mental health.
If you would like a Bible study, we would love to help you learn more about God’s Word and how leaning on Him can protect your peace (more than anything else can!). Click here to schedule a Bible study.